“. . . They made me caretaker of the vineyards, but I have not taken care of my own vineyard.” Song of Solomon 1:6
These are difficult times for families. Financial problems become burdens that weigh down many homes. Psychosocial changes, like the loss the value on the family unit, are affecting the lives of every family member. Children feel abandoned by their parents who are forced by circumstances to work long hours.
On the other hand, society promotes consumption as a means to fill not only basic needs but also the emptiness that many people carry inside. This means people are constantly working to gain the means for their own satisfaction without considering all the hours they are robbing from their family. Many justify it by say it is necessary for two reasons. The first is to give their children a better quality of life, which ultimately is a lie, since all they are giving them is material things. The second is they deserve to have these things since they work so hard. They live in a senseless, vicious cycle. They lose sight of that which ought to be their priority – children, husbands, wives and families who can give them the strength to face life. While it looks like they are caring for their responsibilities, what they are really doing is neglecting the most essential thing – their own home.
Work hard in your job (there’s no other choice) and in school (it’s important), but the most essential thing is your family, children and spouse. They need your attention. You might ask, “How do I do that?” Here are a few ideas:
- Seek a balance between work and family. Family should always be a priority.
- Take time to be with your spouse. Talk to each other, play together, enjoy one another.
- Take time with your children to communicate with them. You must always be ready to listen, slow to speak, and even slower to become angry, which is key to good communication (James 1:19)
- Take care that your children’s needs are truly being met, not only in material things but completely. They need to feel heard, for instance. Make sure to be present when they need you.
- Enjoy your time at home. It is a time to not only rest but also to talk and laugh with everyone. It is a time to make your family feel they are truly being cared for.
May God help you do all that you have learned today.
Dr. Miguel and Irene Garita
Family Care Ministry
